The reason, I didn’t want to go, was (do not laugh at me for this, I’m putting my heart out on the line) a boy. Yes, little seventeen year old me, got sucked into the boyfriend hole. I didn’t want to leave my town to go to university (I’m going to call it uni from now on cause it’s pain to type university every time), because of a boy. A BOY! A BOY!! Just let that sink in. I was ready to put my academic career on hold for a relationship which probably wouldn’t have worked out in the long term (surprise! It didn’t!).
There were other reasons for my reluctance: I wanted to finish my cello grade eight (yes band nerd over here), I wanted to continue to do karate at the local dojo and I was trying to delay the scary notion of being an adult. But mainly it was this boy.
Which was a stupid decision on my part. I didn’t apply for halls, which are residential colleges people usually stay in during their first year at uni. They’re really close to campus, and you live next door to people going to uni for you. Basically it’s a friend making machine. Silly young me skipped over the application believing love would prevail!
I also didn’t apply for scholarships, so I missed out on some mega bucks. Another huge mistake. But these I can recover from.
In fact the whole experience I can recover from. Which is very lucky.
The disintegration of this relationship I had been so invested in, meant that at about 11pm on a Tuesday, the day before I was set to graduate high school I sent in an application to my university of choice.
We’re lucky in New Zealand, in that depending on your previous year results you can be offered a preferential placement and because little book nerd me had worked my bum off in year 12 (we have 13 years in NZ) I got accepted the next day.
I was anxious to tell my friends, as anyone who had wholeheartedly believed in a GAP year due to the comfort of a teenage relationship, would be. But they were happy for me.
My parents were happy too, they had to deal with me and my head that had rocketed off my shoulders and into the cloud that is teenage love. I was on the right course again. Enrolled in uni.
As for my living situation I am extremely lucky that my dad has a house in the city I’m going to uni in. It’s solar powered, the water is collected rain and there’s worms that break down your toilet matter, tmi? But a big win for the environment! 2019 is bringing debt, independence, the adventure of off-grid living and hopefully a lot of new and exciting experiences (I’m going to skip over the drugs tho).
The moral of the story, this story that shouldn’t have even happened to me but did, is don’t let anyone put your life on hold. It was completely my fault, I was too immersed in something temporary that shouldn’t have gotten in the way of my life. I should have looked beyond the simple bliss. I should have looked further and seen that I was really only bring small gains in the short term and ruining my big gains in the long term!
I’d love to hear of any similar close calls or if you’re currently thinking of giving something up for another aspect in your life. You are all beautiful people and your deserve the world and nothing should stop you from reaching high and achieving what you want and deserve.
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